There exists few words in the vocabulary of any language more powerful than NO. NO sets boundaries, defines responsibilities, expectations and often relationships. From the time we are toddlers, NO guides us to what we can touch and eat, acceptable behavior, and roles within a family. We learn not to pull on the cat’s tail, (although the cat may teach us that lesson!) and with the word NO, we exert our defiance and self-will.
“No, I can do it myself!”
Why is the word NO so important in our adult lives? Well, the word continues to set boundaries. If you want to simplify life, try using the word NO. Here are some examples.
Say NO to more work and YES to more time with others
Whenever you say YES to the extra project, new order, or added responsibility, you are saying NO to something else, usually time spent with family or friends. We often say YES to avoid disappointment or disapproval of another. In work and business, you need to carefully weigh when to say NO, but all too often, work life creates NO life. We are actually more productive, more creative, happier and healthier, when we place boundaries on time for ourselves and others. In other words, we learn to say NO. I have never attended a funeral where the kids complained dad spent too much time with them, and not enough time at work!
Say NO to more hours of volunteerism
Now, some of you might find this an extremely rewarding outlet for very noble causes. And, some of you should actually consider donating your time and expertise. When I say exercise the word NO more often, I am speaking to the person who suddenly finds himself or herself with a new part-time job with a non-profit. Without a boundary, there is NO end in sight in assisting with the mission of a non-profit. I recently volunteered for the Alzheimer’s Association. The needs are enormous. I told them about my strengths and background, along with how much time I could donate, then let them decide how best to use me. The key? The boundary around time. I will say NO to any other requests until there is more time in my schedule from other areas.
Want to take some stress out of your life? Look over your calendar and commitments and say NO to at least 5-10 hours weekly of unnecessary commitments. However, instead of thinking you have that much time to trim, think about what is really productive in your life. Most people can prune 5-10 hours, become more productive, and experience less stress. I have a friend who recently purchased a vineyard. He was surprised that as much as 40% of the vine is pruned annually. Wow! That seems counter intuitive. Why prune 40% of possible production? So you gain more production and quality. You may be surprised how this principle can change your life. The power of NO. Try it on this week.